With careers, taking care of children and many of the other responsibilities of life, it's easy for your sex life with your spouse to become mundane or stagnate. With seven children I know how hard it can be. The key to making sure that does not happen is to keep the sexual awareness active in your marriage.
What is Sexual Awareness? I define Sexual Awareness as the perception and reaction to healthy sexual thoughts and feelings you have towards your spouse. For example, if your spouse were to text you several times throughout the day saying how he/she could not wait to get you home naked, you would be sexually aware all day of what's to come.
Without sexual awareness in marriage there is no process of being aware (of sex), which ends with no action taken for lovemaking. To avoid this I have listed a few ideas that help to encourage sexual awareness in your marriage. And as always, Keep It Hot!
Have An Everyday Affair With Your Spouse
Remember the beginning of your relationship when you were dating? Those were good and exciting times together. Why should that end? I've stated previously, "The flame that your marriage begins with should never be put out." Every day is an opportunity for you and your spouse to stoke the flames of love, desire and passion in your marriage.
One way to keep the fire alive is flirting with each other. Flirting with your spouse is one the most fun and romantic ways to increase sexual awareness in your marriage. It reaffirms attraction and adds a nice little kick of spice to your sex life. Dating your spouse regularly is also a great way to keep sexual awareness active in your marriage. It increases strong intimacy and closeness which is a good thing because sexual awareness thrives on intimacy and closeness.
Lets Talk About Sex Baby!
Healthy communication between you and your spouse is a key to keeping sexual awareness active. Healthy communication requires that both parties have an "open door policy" with each other. Your spouse needs to feel that they can talk to you about anything, especially about your sex life.
Healthy communication also requires listening to your spouse free from judgement, nagging and condescension. It's also a great intimacy builder that builds friendship, appreciation and understanding in your marriage that is so needed for increasing sexual awareness.
(If there is psychological unrest at the root of your marriage , then couples counseling is highly encouraged.)
I have found from my own personal experience that when you are not happy with the way you look it dramatically affects the bedroom, psychologically, emotionally, and physically. Exercising every day helps to alleviate weight gain but also has the ability to just make you feel good, thanks to endorphins. It's also a great activity that you and your spouse could enjoy together.
Reign In Those Negative Thoughts
Sometimes just the thought of having sex makes us immediately feel exhausted. In fact, some would say that it seems more like a chore than anything else. If thoughts like this cross your mind it's important to face those thoughts head on and ask yourself why do you feel that way. Is it because you work long hours? Is it because you don't feel attractive? Whatever the reason work to solve the issue or issues. Ignoring these negative thoughts will only cause future problems for you and your marriage.