Boosting Your Spouse's Sexual Confidence

Sexual confidence in a person has a lot to do with how that person feels inside and how they view themselves.  No doubt about it.  But as mates in our spouse's life, it's important to give some assistance in that department. What I mean by assistance is, encouraging your spouse's sexuality by keeping your spouse nicely aware of how hot you think he/she is to you.

With busy lives, it's easy for marriages to get stuck in a rut or what I like to call, the Room Mate Syndrome.  What is the Room Mate Syndrome you ask?  I define it as a marriage that functions like two college room mates living together.  You share the same space every day, but in a way that lacks true intimacy. That's why it is important to make the success of your marriage a priority every day.  Boosting your mate's sexual confidence is a great way to contribute to that priority.

Below, I put together six actions that I have found over the years help encourage and boost sexual confidence.   And as always, Keep It Hot!


Compliment Your Spouse

Complimenting your spouse is a great way to say, I notice you and I like it.   So words like, " you look sexy in that shirt, you are beautiful, I love your smile, etc are not only edifying for your spouse to hear, but it's edifying to see how those words affect your spouse. 

Flirt With Your Spouse

Flirting is not just for the single people.  Its for the happily married couples as well.  It's fun and enjoyable and it keeps you both sexually aware of each other.  Who doesn't like that?

Give Your Spouse a Sexy Nickname

Giving your spouse a sexy nickname is a fun and creative way to let your spouse know how much you love something sexual about them.   Depending on what the name is, you may only get to say the sexy nickname behind closed doors. I really, really like that part.  That makes the sexy nickname even more intimate because it's shared only by the two of you.

Get Your Feel On

Aah, the power of touching. It can convey so much without one word being spoken.  Love, longing, want, desire, reassurance are just a few things that touch can say.  So don't hesitate to get your feel on (when appropriate for the both of you) and show your spouse how much you love her/him.

Whistle Your Appreciation

No matter how old I get I will always enjoy a sexy whistle from my husband.  It makes me feel good inside and it always seems to put a smile on my face.  Wouldn't you love to make your spouse feel the same way?

Be Vocal (Lets Talk About Sex)

Sex talk between you and your spouse should always include being truthful about the sexual needs and desires of each other.  Check out this great article by Elizabeth Heubeck titled Sharing Your Sex Fantasies With Your Partner.  The article gives great insight on how to talk about sexual fantasies with your spouse.  

*If you and your spouse have more serious concerns about marriage sexuality, please consider getting professional assistance with a marriage counselor. 

Brela Delahoussaye

My name is Brela and I am a wife to an amazing man, mother to seven beautiful and inspiring children and thanking God every day for all of his blessings! I believe that every marriage should be a romantic one, a relationship with ardent emotional attachment unlike any other relationship you have ever had. Romance is a beautiful entity of love that installs deeper meaning and depth in your relationship with your spouse. This type of relationship requires keeping God alive and active in your daily lives, even when it’s not the popular thing to do. Being married for over 14 years and still LOVING every minute of it, my husband and I found ourselves being asked frequently by friends and family the same question. How do you stay so happy with each other? I decided to find an answer that would incorporate the aspect of our marriage and encourage others to give more in their relationships. That answer was the creation of Romance Me, a blog that takes a positive look at romance and love in marriages. Here you will find articles from the everyday life experiences of my marriage and parenthood. No textbook responses here! I believe that without romance, the love in marriages is open to fading or being forgotten. So don't wait another minute to romance you spouse! And always remember to KEEP IT HOT!