Communicating When You Don't See Eye To Eye
You and your spouse will not always see everything eye to eye. We as people have the ability to look at one situation or scenario and come out with more than one view or take on it. When this happens (unless your marriage has serious concerns such as infidelity, neglect or abuse, belief in God, etc,.) I have found over the years its best to Agree to Disagree. When you and your spouse do this it says, “I respect what you are saying but I view it another way.” Nothing wrong with that.
Keeping your communication at a respectful level even in the midst of a disagreement is always a good idea. It prevents hurt feelings, arguing that can turn ugly and it’s a great example for your children to see and hear. There have been occasions that my husband and I have Agreed to Disagree and later on with time I have found that his views made more since then I originally gave it. The same for him with me.
Imagine how bad it would feel to to argue with your spouse and say things that you did not mean only to later find that you do agree or understand more their point of view. Avoid putting yourself or your spouse in that position by avoiding these Communication Killers when in disagreement.
Don't Ignore What Your Spouse is Saying and Feeling
Your spouse always has a voice in your marriage even when you do not agree. By ignoring your spouse you are telling him/her that you do not care what he/she has to say or thinking.
Avoid Using Belittling Words
Dismissing or minimizing what your spouse is saying makes communication ineffective. Period. This type of communication is guaranteed to make your spouse feel unworthy and unappreciated.
Leave Sarcasm Out of It
Communication designed to cut or give pain succeeds in creating hurt feelings, emotional detachment and resentment. Something that your marriage can do without.
Stay Away From Condescending Words
Communicating in a superior manner towards your spouse easily takes a disagreement into a full blown argument that can get real ugly. Remember, that even though you may be having a disagreement, you should never forget that your spouse deserves your respect and love.